We all need MORE love...

Wednesday...
woke up early to my precious girl Teagie being here! and its so wonderful to be woke up that way looking down at her smiling face. i immediately have to reach down and take her out of her car seat and plant a zillion kisses on those cheeks of hers. I really treasure the 2 days a week we get to spend together.  i swear it seems every week i get her, she's changed so much in just that short amount of time. her personality is emerging a little more each day....she's such a good easy baby. and she has this little thing she does when she's tired, she grabs her blankie and puts it up to the side of her face and just sucks away on her bink and before you know it, she's out like a light.
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i can't believe Christmas is 12 days away. amazing how fast it goes when you are an adult and have a zillion things to get done. but being a child it crawls by.  i wanted to make this Christmas extra special for my Mama since she has been so sick recently. and now yesterday we found out she has skin cancer. monday i will take her to the doctor and they will numb it up and hopefully get it all dug out. needless to say she's not looking forward to it. seems we've all been having to do a lot of things that we don't want to do for months now. our family has definitely been going through a very trying season. i pray to God that 2018 will be kinder.  seems for months now its been one thing after another. there are days im just struggling by begging for God's mercy and grace. 
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the bestie, Jen took me out to dinner last night and then we checked out "The City Church" for their tuesday night service. we've been trying to go for months now and finally got down there. it was nice but i wasn't particularly moved by the sermon. i like to come away from a church service in awe and i didn't feel that way after the service last night. i'll definitely give it a couple more tries before i make a decision. i want to find a church that feels like my home church. i want to be able to connect with the people who go there and find a home group to get back into. when my dear friends Laura and Aaron lived next door i got involved in there church and every Wednesday we would all gather at their house, cook a meal together, eat together and then have a bible study. it got to the point that everyone started feeling like family. it was the best feeling in the world and i never felt more accepted than i did at that time in my life. I really need that again. i really need that community and to be giving back to the community. i need to be helping others, serving others and spreading love, compassion and peace. im a person that wants to make a difference in the world.
i want to pass out more love, more compassion, more giving...its a  constant need that is stirring in me every day.
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last year i had this little ritual , i'd write out little 'love' notes and i would leave them in random places. i'd title the envelope "This is For You" and i would write a little love note inside telling them that they are loved, they matter.
it made me feel like i was spreading a tiny bit of love out to complete strangers. im hoping whoever found the love notes is someone who needed to hear that specific message that particular day. 
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XOXOXO


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