...on the edge of autumn....saturday night....

it's a full moon tonight...

sitting on the back porch smoking a cigarette i gaze at her...all round, bright and beautiful...

and holding so many promises inside....

....its cool...so i grab for my green summer sweater

i don't have any pants on, just a long oversized t-shirt that hangs right before my knees....

....autumn is coming....i feel her in the breeze that is blowing in through open windows and doors this evening across bare legs....leaving a bit of a chill....

its so nice to have the windows open...its been so long....

the cicadas are silent  and only the crickets fill the otherwise quiet night...

a constant singing and clock ticking..

tick tock, tick tock,

time is a wasting....

~~~~~~~~~~~~

one minute till Sunday....another day of nothing done

and wet laundry on the basement floors

im so tired of rain....

tick tock, tick tock....

~~~~~~~~~~~~

im a mess lately

and i don't know why....

terrible thoughts plague my head day and night...

unworthiness and feelings of not deserving....

~~~~~~~~~~~

i'll have to make an appointment with the doctor for next week....can't go on like this much longer...

the meds have stopped working

XOXO