tuesday brings.....
tuesday rushes in...
with mindless chatter from my soon to be 7 year old princess
the skies are grey and cloudless today with the threat of a rain shower lingering
the humidity is thick, you can almost see the haze of it heavily hanging in the air
the day stretches ahead for me and alayna and i find myself wondering what today has in store for us
their are patches of brown dead grass skirted across the backyard lawn now from a week of no rain and blistering heat
im eagerly awaiting autumn this year. summer has been rainy and too hot to do much of anything outside
alot of being cooped up in the house this month of july
oh...a boom of thunder just exploded and hard drops of rain are now assaulting the window pane behind me
the blare of the tv in the next room is irritating me this morning. i crave calmness and silence
i cannot hear the whispers in my head with the noise in the background
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lately i've been allowing people make me feel worthless. ive been unintentionally letting others control my life, my feelings. i let them make me feel (not good enough) and ive been struggling with shouting, NO to requests that don't work for me and drag me down to the pits of unhappiness
im feeling a need to forcibly take back control
after all we are the keeper of our own stories. we choose to take and learn from our experiences. ultimately it is us who decide to weed out the toxic things and people in our lives
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today i am hiding behind the shadows
lurking behind the pale grey of a winters day
yet still searching for the yellows of happy
to brighten my day
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breathe and exhale
starting over today....
XOXOX
Powerful, powerful, powerful!!! My goodness, I hope you get those nasty cobwebs out of your mind and soul. I was anxiously awaiting the story of what you and Alayna will do with this day, but alas I am taken aback by the dark clouds that are shadowing not your physical world, but your inner world! I would gladly lend you a kind listening ear, if I thought it would help. Hopefully putting these words to pen (so to speak) has helped you to stop those ne'er do wells from raining on your day! Lean on Alayna's innocence today...she's small, but she will help you get through. ;)
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